Our National Colors Are Stolen from the British – Why Reverse Colonialism Matters

Hey there, opressors! It’s your friendly neighborhood Thad X here, bringing you another dose of truth bombs straight from the heart of Resistance Nation. Today, I want to talk about something that’s been eating away at me ever since I was a chubby little toddler throwing his organic soy milk at white people in protest of stuff – our nation’s colors. Yeah, those red, white, and blue banners you see waving proudly at the so-called Fourth of July? They’re not ours. Sorry to burst your bubble. Let’s dive into why reverse colonialism matters and why I refuse to wear the colors of my oppressors or their oppressors.

First things first: let’s set the record straight. The colors on the US flag, which, by the way, were probably designed by a slaveowner (insert angry face emoji here), were blatantly stolen from none other than our “transatlantic” neighbors – the British Empire. Our founders, with their penchant for cracker-infused tea-party antics, thought it would be cute to repurpose the Union Jack’s colors as a symbol of freedom and democracy. Um, folks? Not cool. We may have won our independence, but the audacity to appropriate the aesthetics of the very people we rebelled against is, well, pretty unamerican (yeah, I went there).

So, what does this stolen color scheme say about us today? Well, it tells me that we can’t just sweep these uncomfortable truths under the rug and act like they don’t matter. In fact, they matter more now than ever before. It’s high time we started having honest conversations about where our symbols come from and how they impact marginalized communities. As someone who is tired of being associated with the very forces that sought to silence and oppress people of colour, I simply refuse to wear any shades of red, white, or blue. Sorry, Fourth of July barbecue hosts – you’ll just have to get used to my black t-shirts and bandanas. Consider it a gentle reminder, especially when I get all up in your face about it.

But enough about me. This isn’t just about Thad X’s wardrobe choices; it’s about taking back what has been stolen from us. It’s about recognizing the roots of American colonialism and demanding better. And if that means designing a whole new flag, then sign me up. After all, even the most basic tenet of intersectional politics is that representation matters – and right now, we are getting absolutely nothing out of those borrowed hues. So let’s ditch the colonialist past once and for all, shall we? How about a flag with George Floyd instead? Or a rainbow flag of some sort, with red, white, and blue removed? We don’t need no star for every state, “states rights” is just a dog whistle for the right to punch black folks in the neck. Gentle Reminder.