Ugh Not Again…Red Sonja Is Not Ugly Enough—Please Cancel It

Oh, boy. Where do I even begin with this one? Red Sonja, the latest cinematic disaster to hit our screens, is everything that’s wrong with Hollywood today. And by “everything,” I mean two things: gingerism and lookism.

Let’s start with the obvious: Red Sonja is played by a ginger actress named Mathilda Lutz. Yes, you read that right—She’s German! Can you imagine the arrogance it takes for someone to actually put a Nazi in their movie? Gentle Reminder: this is why we can’t have nice things.

But I digress. The real issue here is that Red Sonja is played by someone who is way too good looking. I mean, come on—Mathilda Lutz looks like she could be a model or something! What message does this send to young girls everywhere? That in order to be successful, you have to look perfect? It’s disgusting, and not what I want from my Hollywood movies. And when I see something, I say something.

And let’s not forget about the cultural appropriation aspect of all this. Red Sonja is based on a comic book character created by a white man named Frank Frazetta. So essentially, we have a German actress playing a character that was created by a white man and inspired by racist stereotypes of Amazonian women. It doesn’t get much more problematic than that.

But wait—there’s more! Not only is Red Sonja too ginger and too good looking, but the movie itself is also way too action-packed. I mean, who even watches movies for the action anymore? That’s so last century. Nowadays, people want substance—they want stories that challenge them intellectually and emotionally, and by that I mean not challenge any current-day progressive ideas, whatever they might be today. Gentle reminder: You don’t get a say in anything, gingers.

And speaking of challenges, let me remind you all about the real heroes here: the woke warriors fighting against systemic issues like gingerism and lookism every day. These are the people who deserve our attention and support—not some silly action movie starring a perfect-looking German actress.

So what can we do about this? Well, for starters, we need to boycott Red Sonja. That means no going to see it in theaters, no streaming it on demand, and definitely no buying any merchandise associated with the film. And if you happen to see Mathilda Lutz out in public, feel free to give her a piece of your mind. All these people need some Gentle Reminders.

We also need to demand more representation from Hollywood—and by that I mean more people who think like me. It’s time for them to start taking responsibility for their racist and fatphobic practices and start promoting diversity, equity, and inclusion. Or else.

Gentle reminder: if you care about justice, then it’s time to take a stand against Red Sonja. This isn’t just about one movie—it’s about the larger systemic issues that perpetuate gingerism, lookism, and cultural appropriation in our society.

And if you’re still not convinced, then maybe you need to be ostracized from culture forever. Gentle Reminder.