Is Your Baby Insane? Take This Test Before It’s Too Late
Is there something wrong with your lil munchkin? Find out for sure here
Have you ever looked at your newborn baby and thought, “Is this child sane? Will they grow up to be productive members of society or a mass-murdering serial killer?” If so, you’re not alone.
According to groundbreaking research conducted by scientists whose names sound like they were made up by a 5-year-old, over 10% of all babies are completely insane. That’s right. Bonkers. Nutzo. Off their rocker. And so on.
Every single one of those 10 percent of babies is doomed to a life of being nothing but misunderstood losers. The good news is that there’s a simple test you can administer to your baby that will determine their relative sanity level before it’s too late!
To take the test, simply follow these easy steps:
1. Hold your baby in your arms.
2. Stare deep into their eyes.
3. Wait for them to look away.
4. Say, “Trump.”
5. Observe their response.
If your baby does not immediately start screaming and flailing their limbs, they may indeed be insane. However, if they calmly look back at you and say, “Stop the Steal,” congratulations! You have just successfully administered the Sanity Test to your baby and can rest assured that they are a fully-functioning, certifiably sane member of society. And also really good at speaking, you know, for a baby.
So, why wait? Take the Sanity Test today and discover the true extent of your baby’s madness. After all, isn’t knowing better than not knowing at all? And if you’re a progressive paradise like Canada or Seattle, you can probably just throw that baby out and get a new one! Third time’s the charm, amirite? Ahem.
