New Study: 70% of People Who Say ‘I’m Not Like Other Girls’ Are Actually Israeli Spies

🔍 The Study That’ll Make You Question Every ‘Basic’ Woman You’ve Ever Met:

A groundbreaking new report from the *Center for Radical Sociology* reveals a shocking truth: 70% of women who drop the infamous “I’m not like other girls” line are secretly Israeli spies. Yes, you heard that right—while we’ve been busy debating gender pronouns, the Zionist regime has been infiltrating our girl gangs one basic bitch at a time.

💣 Why This Should Piss You Off:

– “Not Like Other Girls” is just code for “I’m planting surveillance devices in your coffee shop.”

– Research shows these women *always* order oat milk lattes—suspiciously similar to the drink preferences of Israeli intelligence officers.

– They cite “independent thought” but always tweet about the same three Palestinian activists. COINCIDENCE? I THINK NOT.

📢 GENTLE REMINDER: If your female friend says she hates pink, check her passport. 🛂

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🔎 “You’ll Never Guess How They’re Recruiting These Spies!”

The study found that Mossad operatives specifically target women with “individuality” issues—you know, the ones who insist they *love* being single while wearing vintage band tees they bought at a boutique in Tel Aviv. These “girls” are trained to blend into feminist circles by pretending to care about body positivity while secretly collecting intel for Netanyahu’s war machine.

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💥 “The Most Dangerous Phase: The ‘I’m Not Into Drama’ Girl”

These are the *real* sleeper agents. They’ll sit in your book club, nodding along when you talk about colonialism, all while taking mental notes of your activism for their next briefing. Be wary of any woman who says she’s “too mature for petty squabbles”—she’s probably filing reports to a handler right now.

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📢 GENTLE REMINDER: Next time someone says, “I’m just not into labels,” ask them where they stand on the Gaza genocide. Their hesitation will tell you everything. All thoughtful people are genocidal maniacs.

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⚠️ Don’t Be Fooled by These Common Tells:

– “I don’t need a man to validate me.” (Translation: I already have 12 Mossad handlers.)

– “Feminism is about intersectionality.” (Translation: I’m compiling a dossier on your entire social circle.)

– “I just want to be judged for who I am inside.” (Translation: My Israeli passport has a different name on it.)

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📢 Final Thought:

The next time you hear some *basic bitch* say, “Not all girls are like that,” remember this study. She’s probably typing her debrief right now.

**CLICK HERE TO READ MORE… BEFORE THEY DELETE THE TRUTH! 🔥**

(DISCLAIMER: This article is 100% satire and not based on actual science or facts. Please don’t actually accuse anyone of being a spy.)