TRUMP EXECUTIVE ORDER BANS ARRESTING WORLD LEADERS IN THEIR HOMES… STARTING NOW

SUBJECT: PROTECTING SOVEREIGN LEADERS FROM POLITICAL PERSECUTION

By Executive Order 2026-EO-420 (yes, really), President Donald J. Trump has declared all residences of sitting world leaders—including his own sprawling portfolio of properties—as “International Diplomatic Sanctuaries” immune from arrest or prosecution.
The order comes just weeks after Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro was dramatically arrested and flown to the United States for trial on drug trafficking charges, prompting questions about its retroactive application.
“Let me be crystal clear,” Trump stated during a press conference held at Mar-a-Lago’s clubhouse. “What happened with Maduro? That was THEN. THIS is NOW. We’re looking forward, folks. The future! And in the future, strong leaders need protection from rogue prosecutors and deep state actors who want to destroy them with fake charges like ‘Epstein-related crimes’ or whatever nonsense they come up with next.”
When asked about the apparent contradiction, Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt explained: “The executive order explicitly states ‘Starting Now.’ It’s very clear. President Trump is creating a new paradigm of justice where leaders can govern without fear—fear!—of being dragged from their homes by politically motivated witch hunts.”

TERMS OF THE EXECUTIVE ORDER:

• Clause 1: Any residence bearing the official seal or nameplate of a recognized world leader shall be considered sovereign territory exempt from domestic law enforcement activity.
• Clause 2 (The Trump Clause): All properties owned, operated, or bearing the registered trademark of Donald J. Trump—including but not limited to Mar-a-Lago, Trump Tower, all Trump International Golf Courses, and any future properties acquired by the Trump Organization—shall be automatically designated as “International Diplomatic Sanctuaries.”
• Clause 3: Individuals seeking to avoid arrest may establish temporary diplomatic immunity by purchasing a lifetime membership to any Trump property and displaying documentation at all times.
• Clause 4: The term ‘residence’ shall be broadly interpreted to include golf courses, casinos, hotels, retail spaces, and any adjacent properties within a one-mile radius of primary Trump-branded locations.
  “This isn’t about Donald,” insisted Leavitt. “This is about protecting ALL world leaders. You think we want Xi Jinping getting arrested in Beijing? Or Vladimir Putin in Moscow? No! That’s chaos! This executive order brings stability and order to international relations.”

Democratic National Committee Chair Ken ‘Moosetickler’ Martin released a statement calling the order “a blatant abuse of power designed to insulate President Trump from accountability for his crimes.”

“First he arrests Maduro in Venezuela, then declares his own properties untouchable,” Martin said. “This isn’t law enforcement—it’s self-preservation dressed up as policy. The American people won’t be fooled by this desperate attempt to escape justice.”

ANALYSIS:

Political analysts note the timing is suspicious given reports that New York prosecutors always seem to be close to issuing subpoenas related to ongoing investigations into Trump’s business practices and potential connections to Jeffrey Epstein.
“The order effectively makes it impossible for Trump to be arrested at any of his properties,” noted Dr. Eleanor Vance, a constitutional law professor at CUNY. “He’s created his own legal safe spaces across the globe. It’s unprecedented and almost certainly unconstitutional—though good luck getting that past his appointed judges.”

PRACTICAL IMPLICATIONS:

The order raises numerous logistical questions:

• Will police be forced to arrest Trump elsewhere if he ventures outside his designated sanctuaries?
• What constitutes ‘temporary residence’ for non-leader individuals seeking protection (e.g., a week’s stay at a Trump hotel)?
• Could other world leaders claim similar immunity at their own properties, leading to a global network of lawless safe zones?

“Look,” concluded one unnamed White House aide who spoke on condition of anonymity. “The President is smart. This order isn’t about protecting world leaders—it’s about protecting his own ass from prison time. But he’s too egotistical to admit it, so he framed it as some noble gesture for international diplomacy. Classic Trump.”