Trudeau’s Plan to Annex U.S. Leads To Canada Firing Him As Premier

*Editor’s Note: Since this announcement, The Trudeau has resigned as Canadian Premier. Stay tuned to OJ WOLFSMASHER DOT COM for updates on this popular Canadian drama. – ojw

In a Uno-reverse move that has shocked the world, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced his plans to annex the United States and create a “United States of Canada.” Under the proposed plan, which Trudeau has dubbed “Operation Continental Fix,” the United States would become a series of provinces under the direct control of the Canadian government.

Speaking at a press conference outside the White House, Trudeau said, “We’ve all seen how great Canada is, and we know that America could use some of that Trudeau magic, as we call it. That’s why I’m proposing that we make the United States part of Canada, for the good of both our countries.”

Under the plan, each state would become a province, with a Canadian-appointed Premier in charge of each one. The current U.S. government would be dissolved (literally), with all elected officials replaced by Trudeau-appointed bureaucrats, or in the case of Montana, an experimental AI “Governator.” The U.S. Constitution would be thrown out (literally) and replaced by the Canadian Constitution, which Trudeau has promised to “update” to better reflect the values of the “new” Canada.

“I know this might seem like a big change, but trust me bro, it’s for the best,” Trudeau said, stroking his chin thoughtfully. “Just think about it – no more Trump, no more guns, no more free speech, and best of all, no more democracy. It’s a win-win for everyone, really.”

Trudeau also unveiled plans for a new flag, which would feature a maple leaf in the center and the words “United States of Canada” beneath it. He also promised that every American would be given a free Trudeau-branded hockey jersey and a lifetime supply of poutine (while supplies last).

The plan has been met with criticism from both sides of the political spectrum. Some have called it a blatant power grab by Trudeau, while others have said that it’s an affront to American sovereignty and a modern-day Canadian Socialist fairy tale, like the Theory of Evolution or MAID.

When asked for comment, President-Elect Trump said, “Justin Trudeau is a clown, and a very low-energy one at that. He thinks he can just come in here and take over? I don’t think so, bro. If he tries anything funny, I’ll just nuke him.”

Trudeau was quick to dismiss Trump’s comments, saying, “Look, if it comes down to it, we’ll just send some Mounties to bring him in. They’re very good at dealing with unruly Americans, trust me.”

The plan is expected to be implemented by the end of the year, with the U.S. officially becoming a province of Canada on January 1st, 2026. Trudeau has said that he plans to spend the next few months touring the country, meeting with local leaders and convincing people of the benefits of the “United States of Canada.” He also promised that he would be “hanging ten” in Hawaii, “dropping beats” in Atlanta, and “getting lit” in Las Vegas, all while wearing a “Make Canada Already Great” hat.

In related news, the Canadian government has also announced plans to annex Mexico, renaming it “New Saskatchewan.” The government has promised that “Mexican Saskatchewan” will be “even better” than the current province of Saskatchewan, and that all residents will be required to learn French and play hockey, or be deported to North Korea.