You’ll Love This Ingenious New Way to Cook Bacon Without a Stove (Not Clickbait)

Have you ever been to Arizona during the summertime? It’s hot. Like, really hot. So hot that you can’t even walk outside without turning into a pile of skin cancer and sweat. But did you know that this heat can be put to good use, if you’re clever enough?

The way it works is simple: you just grab a pack of bacon, locate a black car, put on a pair of gloves, grab a spatula, and you’re good to go! Place the bacon on the black car’s hood, and let it cook in the hot, Arizona sun. The heat from the sun cooks the bacon, and it comes out crispy, smoky, and Arizona delicious.

Of course, there are risks involved in Arizona Bacon: the risk of burning yourself, the risk of getting arrested by the police for defacing a stranger’s car, and the risk of getting a severe case of sunstroke. But hey, what’s life without a little risk?

So, go on! Grab your pack of bacon, put on a pair of gloves, and book a flight to Arizona. Once there, locate one of the many black cars (it’s a thing) and get to work. It’s a whole new way to cook bacon, and now you know about it. Don’t say your ol’ pal Kasula Spinkman-Steed never did anything for you.

P.S. If you’re looking for some extra help with your Arizona Bacon endeavors, check out our line of ZZZZZonky Sunstroke Pills. They’ll help you fight off the sunstroke and keep you energized during your next cooking adventure!

So, go on. Don’t be shy. Bacon favors the bold! Find that black car and get to cooking!